after so long

wow....it's already a new year. and im feeling old. nah. feeling down. stupid me. just had to fail a model. now im stuck with unknown pple in a screwed up timetable. fuck. fuck it. stupid me. why me? why me. i know. coz it is me. being me is sucha pain. hah. the irony. im a conceited being who loves myself, but i also hate myself. shit happens. to me. always. well, shit leads to experience, which i neva lack. in certain areas. and tt seems to be failing. im a certified top-rate failure. hah. wad a title to hold. great proclaimation. sheesh. ok. i really really need to start anew. i tell myself tt since my psle year till now. rite up to o-levels and i still havent changed abit. i am the keeper of no promises, made for myself. ok..it's a new year.i shld be joyously trumpeting HAPPY New Year across my page...but....it's a grim new year for me. finding out tt i have been posted to my worst nightmare: a class fulla nerds. ok...it hasnt been confirmed on which class im in, but...i'll at least be joining nerds sometimes, besides lectures. nothing can turn back time. and "what-ifs" do not sympathise me, neither is it a solution. my only solution: to learn from my mistakes. as simple a task as it may seem, it ain't. ok. going to re-arrange my thoughts.