seeking solace

seeking solace, warm embrace. where da fuck did tt come from?ok. wad an anti-climax statement. urgh..i need to get new pjs. my nice comfy old ones all have holes in them. sad....but their so ultra comfy.....ooooh. ok. finally...my computer is up and running. urgh. got back my disastrous obc prac test today. suxx. knew i wld fail. ahahhaa. well...i think i shld better lyke..start revising for obc,i know it sounds insane to start now,but my brain is still functioning at lecture #2 standard,so yea...in order to complete my slow and arduous obc revision,need to start now, u do the math. hehehe. fuck. need to pass my exams. pls, god help me. hahaha. ok, tt wont work. fookie dooks. bored to the grave. boredom eludes the feeling i have now. wad am i feeling? hmmm...let's pick another topic of absurdity today. *pick an imaginery book from the shelf and dusts it off* ok, let's see....*flip.flip.flip.* how abt existence? ok. i wanna use this blog lyke a kind-of-my-own-philosophical-rantings. smthg lyke a cross between socrates cafe and erm...a bit of sophie's world? yea. just my own thoughts of normal stuff, stuff tt most pple dont give two hoots abt. ok, just FYI,i started off with the marriage thing. i think im reaching the brink of insanity.(or am i already there? swimming in insanity?) ok. oooh..so happy..starsailor is back with new album..but doesnt sound tt good. prefer..sugar ray!!!yeps...or wad eva happened to tt band..travis? love them. ok. i kinda lyke all kindsa music. even opera! yea..got tt blind guy's cd..andrea bocelli. hella good. no doubt-love them too.ok. let's see..shall i touch on existence today?dont feel lyke it now.
oh wait.
let me fill in on my happenings first. oh. the stupid sec 2 youth mass. sucked. yeps. and screw the fucking penang trip. YEA! any FPs reading this part, fuck you! i dont wanna go for the penang trip..praying day and nite,i aint a fucking nun. i dont need to escape from reality with a buncha hypocrites(adult fuckers) and pretend to have fun in a foreign land. as i said, my other stuff(school,family and yes, most importantly - My Friends,of course their impt -duh!) are my top priorities.so listen up.
#1 - u cannot force me to go
#2 - when i say no..i mean NO!!!
#3 - feeling unsettled. have plenty of doubts.
#4 - fuck off.
thank you for ur kind attention.ok. on to hmm...think i shall do love talk.yea. i keep on thinking abt "it". i mean, how cld i've been so dumb? those who know who "it" is, hey..i know some of u know. ahhaha. gosh. i was dumb. i mean..how cld i have gotten sucha a wild idea lyke tT? to ever lyke "it"? ok..it's a pain calling the person "it" coz it's hard to type, so shall find a name..."sesame" okok. lame, but, it doesnt disclose anything to prying eyes.love can be sucha a funny thing. i can truthfully and honestly(aint they the same thing?) say tt i've neva been in love. i can have crushes on pple, lyke someone, wateva...but sparks neva flew, and i was neva head over heels in love with anyone.i mean, seriously..this ties in with my self-declaration on marriage. i mean. love can be a young boisterous feeling at first, but soon, lyke marriage, it binds u to ur spouse, making u choke, tighter,tighter, until u suffocate, and eventually die.when the love necrates(<-ahaha.science term!), it cant be rekindled, so a new one has to form. utter rubbish. im a-crapping now. ok..back to talking abt "sesame". ok, tt sux. shall just call it "frink".ok. frink and i..long story. stupid long story. ok. i think im turning. some pple might nt understand,some might, but if u do, then,keep it to urself.fuck it lar. no mood to type already.
ok. here's another thought to throw at ya. why does love affect so many sooo deeply? except me. fuck it. fuck love. i LOVE having friends. but i hate to LOvE. i guess my mind is warped. suxx. these days..i keep thinking abt frink. recently. how dumb i was. stupid me. why? my mind is swamped with frink.frink frink frink. urgh, wad an unsightly word. but frink's name is worse. ahhhh. when do u think im ready to come out and say tt im ____??im very curious abt it.i actually go read up on it.
tooo sleepy to continue. ok. check out the webbie below.

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