eluding the real me

aqualung - jethro tull
the bravery - out of line
baha men - best years of our lives
micheal buble & nelly furtado - quando quando quando
rogue wave - endless shovel


Wednesday, March 30, 2005

the TV addict returns!!!!!

OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! I'M FILLED WITH ULTIMATE ELATION!!!! IM ECSTATIC!!!! IM A TRUE BLUE TV ADDICT!!!! today i saw an advertisement on tv that absolutely made my day. yes, from april onwards, thursday nights are my stay-home nights. yippee doo dah!!! look at the tv schedule, how could anyone resist this??? :

1030 - the OC (season 2)
1130 - One Tree Hill (season 2)
1230 - Everwood (i aint sure if they're showing season 2 or 3.)

oh my god!!!!!!! im totally overjoyed. omg omg omg. hahaa. ok, yeserday i had an OC season 2 marathon. dont ask me why i wasnt studying. i jsut felt like watching it. so far, i've seen the OC season 2, episodes 1-17. and i've seen One Tree Hill season 2, episodes 1-10. and i've seen only 3 episodes from Everwood season 2. coz now they're only offering downloads of season 3, so it's pretty hard to come by. dang. im totally into tv. ok, bu the OC and OTH seems to be having similar new additions, like latinos and lesbians. ahhaa. hinting to all you who are potential fansof these shows. omfg. tv tv tv tv tv tv.

i dont care if i've seen the episodes before, i would stil wanna stay home and goggle at the black box. ooh laa laa. really hope Everwood is season 2. yay!!! nothing could destroy this happy moment!!!so pple, i can afford to miss out on the first few episodes of these shows, but somewhere in june, i must stay home on thursday nights to catch the later parts. or shld i just continue with illegal downloads??? lalalalalalalalalalalalalala.

**there's "tru calling" on tonight!!!!yea!!!! finally singapore screening it. love it. love eliza dushku. yea...omg!!!!

Sunday, March 27, 2005

plight of injustice

as im sitting here on a decent easter sunday, albeit it didnt in the least bit feel like easter, i feel that life is quite fair. u reap what u sow. so im jsut hoping ive sowed enough to earn me a definitive passing into the next level of education. i'm still stuck on immunology. unfortunately, ive been the world's biggest bum; owing to the fact tt this subject totally throws me off focus, and that all the topics are somewhat linked,so i have to go crazy trying to understand the basics before progressing. how unfortunate. not. guess for once i realize that i deserved it. darn. i feel the strain now coz im not only studying for the sake of myself, but for someone else as well. yes, you, stupid ben ho. if i fail,it wld mean u wld have no partner for fyp. so here i am, trying my best, or at least what i think is my best. if not, failing really isnt sucha big deal to me. of course no one wants to fail, but i mean, you know when you'll fail. dont u all have that gut feeling? and no, im not talking abt those who have earn Bs' instead of As. tt doesnt count.

i want my chocolate eggs!!! *ransacking house frantically, determined to get a chocolate overload* dang. doenst seem to have any left. boo. im so unmotivated. help me. help me. help me. someone help me. i jsut feel like screaming for no particular reason at all. just feel like it. but of course, that would be nuts. what i really really feel like doing now is watching 'the nanny'. ahaha. seriously. i even rmb me imitating the episodes during mrs fernanado's math class in primary 4. omg. im innsane. i cant rmb wad T-cells do, but i can rmb wad happened, *gasp* - 10 years ago!!! van chung was always my acting & antics accomplice. heh. those were the days.

okok. shant waste time over useless stuff. i shall try to apply immunology in everyday context. it wld help greatly. and jsut for everyone's info, tt rubbish pasted on the immuno discussion board was posted by zhenyo, who farkedly used my account. arses. already make me sound like some desperado, asking for extra marks and rridiculous crap, then the other post!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *shakes fist in their faces* cows!!! as yao would say "moo cows!!!" cant u all 'sympathize'(does stupid action) with me too?hahaa. i have better taste than to pick **L***. oh puh-leez, spare me from the humiliation. dang.

Thursday, March 24, 2005

mathematical wash-out

i think i'm one step closer to utter damnation. maths reeked. i thought i would know a pretty decent amount of stuff, but apparently i was just a little less clueless than before. oh well. it's over. no point harping on the same subject. i wldnt work miracles. yeps. on to acmb and immunology. think i shld place amb aside for awhile, sicne it seems to be slightly less taxing than the others. plus acmb i need to hand in all my practical reports, since i havent done a single one. am i screwed or am i screwed? so here's wishin' the rest of you suckers out there much luck and fortune for the upcoming exams, and may we all be able to rest in peace. amen. shit. i ahvent been for penitential. think need personal confession. damn. i've been unholy this whole holy week. ironic. will make up for it next time. lent wasnt even sacrificial. damn. maybe coz in my mind i list 'church' as a pet peeve. okok. shant waste anymore time. with my poor performance in maths today, i think i must work doubly, make that quadruply hard at my other modules. im determined to get passes across the board again. or leave immunology as my only tentative failure.nothing more. pls pls. help me. would it be too late to ask for a little help from god now? whatever.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

you, or you, or YOU!

wishful thinking. i shant elaborate on that.

next up, watched smthg on tv recently, quite sadd, but i cant rmb what i watched. i cant rmb much of anything these days. really.

but i do rmb this. how cld pple in this world be so selfish? i cant understand. usually when someone sks for help, people would naturally up and help that person, but noooooooo. u actually had the time to say "eh, no, no,...." trailing off, coz i cldnt really hear wad u said, but u were making it extrememly obvious that u were unwilling to share you dire skills and 'beloved' work with us. no one wants it anyway. we cld always ask others for help. now i know. i hate these kinda pple. others help them, be it academically,socially,physically, whatever it is, pple offer help, yet you just like to keep your own things to yourself. keep ur skills and knowledge, i dont want them. no one wants them. and fuck your class. the whole fucking bunch. so what if i made some friends there? it took me almost two years to make friends with you all, and i dont mind losing it in a minute. expect me to learn for a test, when no one returns my work. excellent. i know im not very bright, or good with my school work, all the more you all should like, you know, use a little intiative. return me my poo work, at least i can learn a wee bit from corrections or smthg. fuck. yea, and all of you panicking like prairie dogs on high alert over the test. commenting that you didnt study enough, you're likely to know too little, all those phrases along those lines, whereby you say you would not do well, some go as far as saying they would fail, but i bet deep in your hearts, you are all like 'i think im only gonna get 70/100, but i want 90!!!'. all i can say is fuck you all. maybe this is like pms-ing or smthg, but i get so irate over pple with false premonitions over their academic excellence. because, unlike you fucking smart arseholes, im not. i fail when i say i fail. i dont need to pep myself with verbal abuse before a test.

if you think im talking about you, or you or YOU, and are thinking of ceasing whatever friendships i have with you pple, by all means go ahead. i dont need more friends in this life. i think i have enough for now, thank you. and if any of you are so unhappy or curious to know what this is about, i'll be glad to entertain you. for awhile.

Saturday, March 12, 2005

all over again

it is doomsday once again. how nice. exams round the corner. what a dull period. ok, more like hectic. off i go into a world of sorrow(not quite, just intense boredom). ladeedah. must pass everything. come on!!! you can do it!!!i can do it!!!yay. boohoo.

Sunday, March 06, 2005

lemony snicket's a series of unfortunate events

i love this show. absolutely. i dont care what the critics say. it's like, whoa. and the kid actors, they were like so intense. emily browning looked so porcelain. like sophie ellis baxter. and liam aiken. phew, he's one hottie, and he like what, my bro's age? eew. ahaha. anyhow, the movie has encoruaged me to go get the book, coz it would definitely be better. i think daniel hander, the author, must have had a pretty disturbing childhood or something. whatever it is, my last movie was constantine, so yea. i wanna start watching movies frequently again. i wish. anyhow, spent time with yao, alvin and his friend, joel. no, dont start grimacing pple. it's jsut his sec sch junior. heh. yeps. that's about it i guess. i wanna go do maths diligently. i aspire to be diligent student, daughter, friend, and eventual member of the workforce. there's a few pics of the movie below.

Lemony Snicket's a series of unfortunate events
copyright my ass

the Baudelaire children: an inventor, a reader, a primate.
copyright my ass

liam aiken aka klaus baudelaire
copyright my ass

emily browning aka violet baudelaire
copyright my ass

dont they look gorg?
copyright my ass

Friday, March 04, 2005


i think i am sick. feeling all melancholy. no lar. listening to stoically unsound songs right now. i dont wanna go to school anymore. i wasnt born to study. *sigh* i just wanna hang around and wait for telly programmes to start.

ok, just read the "scholars' choice" section in the papers. every year i read this. and every year i sayto myself, i want to get that AVA scholarship, but my results are never good enough. yea. wtf lar. anyhow, think i have to give up on ambition. sometimes, ambition is jsut meant to be an ambition, it shouldn't be attained in reality. why? coz when things go awry after that, life would jsut fall to pieces. so at least, when a goal is unsurmountable, at least i can live through life being a little more happy. i dont know what im ranting about. oh, changing direction. i think after acquiring this stupid diploma in biotech, i dont wanna pursue a science career anymore. i was so stupid to want it all this while. damn dumb. if im able to, i would wanna pick up a simple journalism course in university, and well, branch out into wildlife articles. the closest i would ever get to science. but looking at the world now, my standard of english is so darn poor, im not much competition for anyone 'cept maybe some pri sch kids. always feel so down when poly exams draw near, but why shld anyone care? they al know they'll pass, poly is suppsoed to be easy, a breeze to most. grrr. whatever. im resigned at the fact that i will never get what i want. stop thinking that being optimistic will eventually bring home the medal, coz it doesnt. i think i should get started on my maths or smthg now. yes.

im so fulla shite.

**hope u A-level receipients did well, and if u didn't, well, u'll get placed somewhere evetually. there's a place for everyone.