i think i'm going a little nutty now. i'm was paying attention in church today. like extreme attn, so much so tt i can pick apart that crazy old bat's sermon word for word. ok, not really, but i can break it down to reality for you.
(boring talk on sermon at mass ahead....)he spoke on the arcane topic of death. what a morbid theme on our suppoed feast day. yes, there was a big carnival thing going on, but yours truly always feels her most anti-social during these kinda events, so decided to do some escapism instead. okok, on to death. what does it mean when u try to embrace death? i know he said we're not meant to fear death, and that the rich are extremely fearful of death, because their afraid of losing all their wordly posessions, their material items, their wealth, whatever money could buy. but the real concept of embracing death was that we that our ultimate goal was to meet ur maker, and we should be happy to do so. utter rubbish. so what about those people who constantly contemplate suicide? or those who die due to suicide? yes, they are embracing death as well, they do not fear it. tere's two ways of looking at it. suicidals either try to run from their troubles by turning to death, or they truly believe their time is up, that they would no longer make a difference to other people's lives, so might as well end their own. isn't that embracing death as well? maybe im over thinking this whole gibberish the priest was ranting on about, but i firmly believe that no one would want to embrace death wholeheartedly. that we all have our flaws too. he said those who live in poverty would not fear death, for they have nothing to lose. the simple pleasure in life are enough. and i agree to that as well, but sometimes, we're only human, and we always want more than we have. there are poverty-stricken people out there who also curse the heavens and wish they were dead rather than suffering. most definitely.
then he went on to love. i dont really see the relevance, but oo-kay. whatever, silly redemptrist preist. he said we should all work to LOVE. wtf. work to love? he thinks we all ought to build relationships with everyone around us, that in order to be a better person, we should be selfless and teach others how to be better than us. i know this i a good thing, sharing knowledge with others, but this is a dog eat dog world man, people are selfish and money-hungry. no one is going to let someone else become better than them, no one is going to give up a promotion to another more deserving person either, it's all about ME ME ME in this day and age. and herein lies the hypocrisy of christians. it is true. i've mentioned time and time again, the most pious of chrstians are also the biggest hypocrites of all time. whatever. hope i made some sense of it.
oooh, another thing i find interesting, what was written in the catholic news(yes i read that, no surprise what, quite interesting.), a review of the latest harry potter film by a nun. wow!!! she agreeed that it was pretty good, and that the author is not shaping the minds of youngsters to become demon worshippers. i personally agree that the fav quote from that movie is "you can make a choice between taking the right way, or the easy way out" well, it goes smthg like that, quoted from the great albus dumbledore himself. i dont see why christians of other denominations find the harry potter series so revolting. it is sheer talent this woman has, to conjure sucha world for us all to enjoy. it posess the atypical good versus evil, school woes, a little romance, racial entanglements, whatver we have in the normal world. i think everyone else should read the HP article by this local singaporean nun, how she cld quote the bible for certain words spoken from the movie, as well as the book. i think im kinda obsessing with religion today. i shall stop.
(boring parent bashing rant ahead....)i'm already 19 for god's sake. i dont think i have earned a grounding. plus, im not incapable of going out you know. i think i deserve to go out you know. i havent been to town in 2 months. who the hell living in singapore has not been to town in 2 months? who, tell me? if u gorund me by banning me from enjoying myself, of course i'll be grouchy. im not being rude when i tell you to stop irritating me, because im older now and i've begun to see the world differently. ive been leading such a sheltered life, no thanks to you both, that i feel so trapped. which i entirely insane as well, bcoz i do get to enjoy myself, but at the back of my mind im always worried to offen you, to do smthg wrong just in case the consequences end up worse than expected. i think it's stupid to type this here, but don't u think i'm a little old for caning? at 19? come on, people stop getting caned at 12, but im still getting it, and im almost not a teenager anymore. that is highly unsatisfactory. so i went out, to someone's house mind you, h-o-u-s-e. not to town, not to a club. plus, i told u all in advance, i always tell you in advance where im going, and who im going with. it's not that i just go out and come back as i please. i stick to the rules, however stringent. sometimes i have no choice but the bend the rules a little, but my lifestyle can no longer tolerate your discipline. i think it's high time i tell you that i hate you both, but i cant bear to say it. bcoz of what would come afterwards. im on the short end of the stick. whatever i say or do, im always on the losing end, so no point. im not my brother, who has the balls to give a snide remark in response to their reprimands, or my sister who whines to get out of trouble. ive seen the consequence of that. look at my bro? he's jsut asking for trouble whenever he blurts a rude comment. how stupid. i wld rather be quiet and bear the brunt of it all. i know, cowardice shows, but sometimes, more like all the time, if you know you won't win,( not "can't" i used the word "won't", a note of finality.) might as well not start a war, right? whatever. im just quite pissed. and i wld rather dig a hole in the ground and ust stay there.
OK!!!!!!!!!!!!! i wanna watch R.E.N.T. please!!!!!!!!! 25 novemeber till 4th december. limited time man. i so wanna go. i would be soooooo disappointed if i miss it, though i know the movie is due out soon, but nothing like seeing smthg with an almost original broadway cast performing. come on, someone be so kind as to watch it with me. ive been ranting and raving about it for ages, way before it was announced to be in singapore. really!!! fine fine. whatever.
